I've been pitying myself all day.

For being alone, which is my fault anyway. funny how it's so easy to go from self-pity to self-loathing.

Rock ballads.

Didn't know I could sink so low.

And I try to justify everything I feel, I don't know.

It's so easy to bury it all down, yet so hard to confront it all; part of me wants to talk about it and get help, part of me wants to stuff it down deeper and let no one know.

pop rock...

rock bottom...

Vertical Horizon

Everything You Want

Somewhere there's speaking

It's already coming in

Oh, and it's rising at the back of your mind

You never could get it

Unless you were fed it

Now you're here and you don't know why

But under skinned knees

And the skid marks

Past the places where you used to learn

You howl and listen

Listen and wait for the

Echoes of angels who won't return

He's everything you want

He's everything you need

He's everything inside of you

That you wish you could be

He says all the right things

At exactly the right time

But he means nothing to you

And you don't know why

You're waiting for someone

To put you together

You're waiting for someone to push you away

There's always another

Wound to discover

There's always something more you wish he'd say

-Vertical Horizon-Everything you want

and this song has just put me over the edge. I can look foward to more of this tomorrow, only in public...

Older Stuff:
i'm a chargin mah laz0rz. - September 30, 2008
the summertime blues - June 21, 2008
my life so far - March 22, 2008
empty pockets - February 19, 2008
speech pattern changes - March 12, 2007

don't be afraid of the future. it doesn't include you, it only removes you.

It is the duty of every patriot to protect his country from his government."
- Thomas Payne